just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize
