I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
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