HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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