Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
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