Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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