I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
