he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I just made out with a guy for $7.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
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