that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
