Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
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