wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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