I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
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