I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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