yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
