20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I will pee on everything he values.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Randomize
