That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Randomize
