yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
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