Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
Randomize