What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
