He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like heaven, but drunker
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
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