So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize