your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
Randomize
