I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found the other keg... it's in the tree
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Randomize