Just fell off a train. Bad.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
