The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
