Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Randomize
