Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
Randomize
