ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize