Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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