i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
