i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
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