Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
