I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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