The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
