Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
