this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
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