I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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