Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(513): View more from Ohio

I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors

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(740): View more from Ohio

Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.

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(518): View more from New York

Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(507): View more from Minnesota

Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet

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(541): View more from Oregon

She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option

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(512): View more from Texas

My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"

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(813): View more from Florida

Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?

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(843): View more from South Carolina

i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again

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