they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Randomize
