you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
