Kiss
Puke
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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