And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
