I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Randomize
