butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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