I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Randomize
