We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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