Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Randomize
