I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
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