all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Randomize
