ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
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