I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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